by mjhardenITOO | Jun 4, 2019 | ITOO
We had plans, Anthony and I: hike rainforests; rappel waterfalls; practice yoga together; write a book about his very unusual life—violent, then redemptive. Finally, he would live again a free Hawaiian man on his beloved Maui. But, it is not to be. It is all hypothetical past tense as I learned from the astonishingly real front-page headline in The Maui News. “Infamous murderer recalled for his laughter.” I read it as I carried the paper into the house. And then I don’t know where I went, apparently standing inside, yet gone, almost unconscious. Not breathing. Not crying. Stunned. Disappointment overwhelmed me. Anthony will never see his beloved Kahakuloa Valley again. He won’t see how modern Maui has become since he went to prison in 1978. He won’t meet his grandson. He won’t start his “Talk Them Straight” program for at-risk high school kids. Anthony planned to visit high schools to teach local kids what happens when you go too far kolohe (crazy). He had already started his program while incarcerated in Maui’s prison. He made sure these tough kids walked out afraid of him and afraid of prison. He was a good actor, brutal and intense. “You can be our bitches in here,” he’d tell them and they soon crumbled. He didn’t mean it, but he didn’t let on. Of all the ideas we had for his reintegration, death was never considered. He was 66. He died the same year he was supposed to return to Maui to start reintegration. After 41 years he was going to get out. But, he died of a heart attack on the way to his...
by mjhardenITOO | Mar 8, 2018 | ITOO
As a writer, i love Mya Angelou’s books. As a woman, i love her attitude and her wisdom and her life experiences. When she died, I was on Moloka’i Island, staying on a deserted beach, trying to finish It Takes Only One. I woke to the news, went down to the beach and ceremoniously asked her spirit for help with my final lines. I think i got it. I love ITOO’s ending. Her face inspired this drawing of Earth Mother and Nigerian goddess, Ala. She is the goddess of Earth, of morality, of fertility, of creativity. She rules the Underworld and is guardian of women and children. She is also in charge of the beginning and ending cycles of life. She welcomes the souls of the dead to rest in her own womb. Sounds like a comforting idea. This is a trailer for a documentary about Angelou. The line i like best is: “When I reached for the pen to write, I had to scrape it across those scars.”...
by mjhardenITOO | Jan 11, 2018 | ITOO
It’s my birthday this month, and on the day itself, i went up to Haleakala Crater for some hiking and thinking time. But, before i went, i was actually in a head shop in cute little Pa’ia Town. It was, surprisingly, a crowded, tiny upstairs store crammed with shoppers and glass pipes. As I left, everyone high fived my birthday and my Crater choice for such a day. One young (20ish) woman said: “Have a great time, Sweetie.” Sweetie. Are you kidding me, small girl — Sweetie? Here’s a great story that explains the effect of “Sweetie” on women older than you. When I was a 14-year freshman, ignorant of all things, an old Jewish woman came to our Catholic girls’ school to talk of the Holocaust. She was tough, no nonsense, with a glint in her eyes that was not kind. I liked her from the get-go. She also intimidated me. She rolled up her sleeve and showed us the vertical numbers tattooed on the inside of her arm. Wow. That got our attention even if we did not understand (at age 14). Somehow we knew the pain that tattoo embodied. She told us that a young clerk had casually called her “Sweetie” during a shopping transaction recently, and she was apparently still not over it. Demeaning, patronizing, grandmotherly — that word did not fit this warrior woman. “Don’t ever call an older woman “Sweetie,” she spit out. “You do not know the depth of her life.” That says it, doesn’t it? So, me too. Do not call me Sweetie because I too am digging down into the...
by mjhardenITOO | Nov 25, 2016 | How ITOO unfolded, Nature as muse
I have not written in this blog for nearly a year. On purpose. I am trying to learn to market the ebook way (insanely complicated), and I run into so many blogs that i wonder why write yet another. Still . . . . . I have decided to reprint my book’s introduction in order to explain what is truly a very different book. INTRODUCTION I have always been a writer in a rather “straight” journalistic mode (books, magazines, brochures, manuals, articles, reporting, editing). I have a couple of journalism degrees, and for me, writing is craft plus talent. And it’s a job. How then did a “normal” writer come up with this bizarrely different book? Definitely not a job. More like a mission. How did this happen? Magic. I would have to say magic. We’ve been told for centuries “to ask and you shall receive,” and so I followed that advice. I’ve written everything from a documentary to a birthday card, but, I wondered, is there a reason I have this propensity to write? And so I asked. Out loud, twice a day, morning and evening, for three days. It wasn’t a prayer, it wasn’t a demand, it was a simple request: “Tell me what you want and I will do it.” On the third day the process of knowing began. Or rather, the process of surprising myself. I walked into Maui’s Haleakalā Volcano to clear my mind and let the message come through. Haleakalā is quiet and expansive, a massive place for inspiration. By the time I hiked to the crater floor, a 3,000-foot descent, I had it....
by mjhardenITOO | Apr 16, 2016 | ITOO
I read this quote just in time. Just as I was folding. “The final—and sometimes most difficult—act of creative trust is to put your work out there into the world once you have completed it. . . Fierce trust demands that you put forth the work. . .” Elizabeth Gilbert in her book, Big Magic Thank you, Elizabeth Gilbert, runaway successful author of “Eat, Pray, Love,” a brave work that exposes her frailities ‘n vulnerabilities. IT’S WEIRD TO FINISH A BOOK . . . especially one that’s been chasing after you for two decades as mine has. All kinds of emotions you were not expecting do pop up. And joy is not one of them. Neither is pride. The emotions tend to range on the shadowy side. Variations of fear . . . people won’t like it. . . I’ll be considered a (fill in the blank). . .the book will be viewed as silly, sophmoric . . . it will flop . . . no one will know about it (more to come, i’m sure). HOW ‘n WHY How will one book sell amidst the millions already loaded onto Amazon? Am i whisperimg into a void? Writing just for myself? Why does one book matter anyway? Or one painting? Or one scientific theory? Or whatever it is that you do creatively? Is there a sigh of relief when the book’s last word is written? Certainly not. The book cover and website designs take another six months. Followed by months and months of techie ebook research. FInally, marketing. Blogging, SEO, Facebook, Twitter . . . these modern marketing methods...
